FaceBook Offends Me – Report It


If you are somehow stuck on Facebook and have found yourself to be offended, read this not-so-quick emergency guide for how to solve this tragic problem.


There is only one sure-fire way to guarantee you won’t ever be offended on Facebook.

Log off.

If you are unclear on how to do that, please just walk away.

Yes, that is the only sure-fire way to avoid being offended on the internet. And while you are logged off, how about you go do something about those things on the internet that offended you so much?

Who Gets Offended by Stuff on the Internet?

I could sit here and list certain groups of people who I think usually get offended, at least in my experience, such as religious people, overly sensitive people and people who have experienced ‘bad things’ in life. But I think it goes beyond any of those group labels, and actually is far more related to a person’s individual character. So who are these characters?

Self-Centered People

self-cen·tered  [self-sen-terd]

  • Concerned solely or chiefly with one’s own interests, welfare, etc.; engrossed in self; selfish; egotistical.

“Surely you jest,” the self-centered are now thinking.  “Just because I am willing to protest offensive internet material does not mean I am self-centered, it means the opposite! It means I care too much!”  Bullshit. It only means that somewhere in your narcissistic little head, that you think, hell, sometimes even expect, that something should be altered for the sake of little ole’ you.

The Internet Doesn’t Care What You Think

Try as hard as you can to remember that ‘The Internet” :
  • Is not a ‘person’
  • Does not have a sensitivity filter
  • Is not solely for you to use
  • Is not out to get you
  • Does not have its own conscious thought or free-will

It’s is little more than a giant trashcan at the bottom of a series of tubes and pipes.

Quit Being so Offended by Updates

All of those changes and updates and things you’ve been bitching about have also included a myriad of ways to hide a single post, hide three different levels of post from any given users based on an importance rating, and clicking these options all takes one single click. To report, it takes a minimum of four.

But Someone Posted a Picture of Domestic Abuse / A Sad Puppy / A Cross Eyed Person / A Nipple / An Erroneous Comment on Their Wall Where I Could See It!

Yes, so why is it up to you again to complain about it? To judge a friend, Facebook or Face to Face type? It really isn’t. I have seen this type of crap posted before on some lame ass Facebook status or another so here is my version, and the answer to your question.
While you were busy reporting the picture of a woman being punched in the face on a meme, a woman who has been domestically abused is getting a good laugh at it, it is helping her to cope in her own way, with those terrible memories. It also reminds her how dangerous that situation is. Shedding the terrible, replacing sad memories with laughter, even if only for a moment. Somehow she made it through all that without being as whiny and overly sensitive as you. While you were upset and reporting someone making fun of a cross-eyed kid, you had no idea that the cross-eyed kid himself posted it originally because he handles the bullshit life gives him by facing it head on. While you got upset over a nipple slip on your wall, you didn’t bother to learn shit about that girl who posted a sliver of her nipple on her own Facebook wall and realize that she was posting what her ‘new’ nipples look like now that cancer and a double-mastectomy took both of the original tata’s and now that she has her pride and dignity back, she wants to share with her friends how great of a job the tattoo artist did creating her new nipples.
All true stories from people I have known that have been reported or harassed on Facebook by the offended.
Better Yet! If you don’t mind all that clickin’, click your ass on over to Change.org orCare2.com and whip up a petition protesting some intolerable event of domestic abuse in your city or state. You don’t even have to literally stand up to do that. Or, you could get off your ass and go volunteer some time actually talking to a victim. While you are there, ask that person if they think any of your complaints of offense, or rabid report clicking ever stopped a punch to their face. Ask them if you ‘making a stand’ on a social network ever helped any of them get out of a bad situation. Oh? But your intolerance of a picture or a comment on the internet is, ‘making a stand?’ No it isn’t. Making an actual stand against something, means actually standing up and being pro-active for a cause. Doing something non self-centered about something that offends you could include:
  • Rescue one of those sad dogs you rage about being mistreated
  • Extend yourself, if you see someone genuinely in need, don’t just get offended about it, help them with a solution, or at least make an effort
  • Maybe you have an extra five bucks, why don’t you click on over to your bank account and donate $5 dollars to a foundation that will help women recovering from breast cancer
  • Talk kindly to the kid who is cursing up a storm on Facebook at 4am, instead of just making him more miserable by taking his only obvious babysitter away for a couple of days.
All of the other shit, your questionable judgement, morals, misgivings, obvious ignorance, and ouchy places that leave you in an offended clicking and commenting frenzy, should probably just be stored in your closet full of skeletons before you consider logging on to Facebook anyway.

About J Lyn

Joy Lynskey is a freelance copywriter and social media manager. With a focus on social media growth for businesses, Joy has content in many areas of digital branding all over the web. View all posts by J Lyn

9 responses to “FaceBook Offends Me – Report It

  • Justin Connelly

    I think you should know that I find this blog post to be OFFENSIVE!

    Seriously though, nice article. While it is always important to challenge ridiculous, offensive, or obscene ideas and idealogies, censorship is almost NEVER the answer. Especially on the internet, where participation on any given site is voluntary.

    Keep up the good work! I will be back 🙂

  • Buzzy

    Yes, the PC feebs and passive-aggressives are a pain but I have to say that there might be a lot less whining if they allowed us to hide everything that offends us. I got suckered into a crappy FB browser game that my OCD prevents me from quitting (yet). This means I have far too many “friends,” most of whom I would never interact with otherwise. I need their game posts but there is now no way to choose what else I see from them. I don’t care that someone likes women in rubber underwear. I don’t care if someone likes women with big butts or tattoos or has any other lame hobby. I don’t give a shit about most of what they post and especially not what they “like.” But I see it. And FB often gives me no option to hide it–or if it does, that doesn’t prevent it from appearing again.

    Those “likes” are an issue on their own. I’ve been told I liked something I never would have. I’ve asked people why they were endorsing something I know they’re against (they didn’t). This applies to likes, suggested pages, suggested posts, sponsored ads, suggested apps, and an ever-growing list of spammy crap that appears on my wall. Yes, we can often pull down a menu to “report” it as spam (which again does nothing to minimize these things and more likely just makes more garbage appear as they attempt to hone in on my personal preferences) but they come right back, even if I hide them.

    Yes, the Internet is a haven to the ignorant, the self-important, and the clueless, but IMHO FB itself, in their unwillingness to provide easy, intuitive, and STABLE (as in they don’t change in function or location every few weeks) tools to set preferences, control who and what you see, and quit trying to make up new and annoying ways to try to make money off its users, Is perhaps the most offensive thing of all and deserving of the monster they’ve created. The phone app has become the worst of all, with quadruple the spam and few tools to deal with it. Surely, there has to be a happy medium.

    • Joy Lynskey

      I can’t really agree more. With any of that. I have pretty much had the same issues, especially with gaming. The sponsored ads and etc, that has definitely been amped up lately and will only get worse. There are actually lawsuits pending right now about this exact issue.

      Unfortunately, I have serious doubts that they will ever take a user-centric stand and when ad sales begin to seriously decline (more than they have just this year already) they are more than likely to just say screw it and let it sincerely fall to pieces as they walk away counting their money.

  • Fred Voetsch

    I love it! Someone who thinks the Internet should be free and unrestricted telling people how they should or shouldn’t act on the Internet. George Carlin would have a field day with this moron. I miss you, George.

    • Joy Lynskey

      We must not know the same George Carlin. The one I remember would have had a good time laughing about people who log onto the internet and spend hours reporting things that are on it.

  • Aaron Kane Thorpe

    Here, here! People bitching about things online but never actually doing anything constructive about them (not even simply writing about them in an instructive or insightful way) is one of my biggest pet peeves. Most of the time those folks don’t even really know why they’re offended in the first place.

    Personally, if I see something that offends me on facebook, I like to take it head on and verbally kick the person who shared it in the rhetorical teeth. Ever so much more satisfying than clicking the “report” button.

  • Johanna Roberts (@sephirajo)

    I hope to god you’re fucking kidding when you put “domestic violence” on the same level as being upset because there’s a sad puppy. Because that’s as gross as hell.

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